Can I Challenge This Belief for You?

“Can I challenge this belief for you?”

It is one of the questions I often ask when talking with patients, families, and even colleagues.

Not because anyone is wrong.

But because many of the hardest decisions in medicine, and in life, are shaped by beliefs we have never really examined.

Sometimes those beliefs are deeply personal. Sometimes they come from past experiences. Sometimes they come from fear, guilt, or assumptions about what “good care” is supposed to look like.

And sometimes, the most helpful thing we can do is make space to look at them differently.

The Beliefs Behind Difficult Decisions

A family may believe that choosing comfort-focused care means giving up.

A patient may believe that accepting help means losing independence.

A clinician may believe that doing more treatment automatically means providing better care.

These beliefs are understandable. They often come from love, responsibility, and a desire to do the right thing.

But if they remain unspoken, they can quietly shape major healthcare decisions without anyone stopping to ask whether they still fit the person’s goals, values, or current reality.

That is where the conversation matters.

Creating Space for Reflection

When we pause and ask, “Can I challenge this belief for you?” something important can happen.

The conversation can shift from positions to understanding.

From assumptions to exploration.

From fear to clarity.

The goal is not to argue someone out of what they believe. It is not to push them toward a specific decision.

It is to create enough space for reflection that patients and families can consider what matters most to them and whether the choices in front of them truly align with those priorities.

More Information Is Not Always the Answer

In geriatrics and palliative care, it is easy to assume that the solution to uncertainty is simply more information.

Sometimes it is.

But some of the most meaningful breakthroughs do not come from adding another fact, statistic, or treatment option.

They come from asking the right question.

A thoughtful question can uncover what someone is afraid of, what they are trying to protect, and what they believe a certain decision means.

Once those beliefs are visible, the conversation becomes more honest and more useful.

The Role of Geriatrics and Palliative Care

My role is rarely to tell people what to think.

It is to help patients and families understand their situation, reflect on their values, and make decisions that feel consistent with what matters most to them.

That may mean challenging the idea that accepting support means losing control.

It may mean exploring whether more treatment is actually helping someone live the way they want to live.

It may simply mean giving a family permission to ask questions they have been afraid to say out loud.

The goal is clarity, not compliance.

Better Questions Can Lead to Better Care

The right question can change the direction of a conversation.

It can help people move beyond fear and assumptions and toward decisions that feel more informed, intentional, and personal.

Sometimes that question is simple:

“Can I challenge this belief for you?”

At Varahe Health Services, we believe meaningful care begins with listening, reflection, and honest conversation. By helping patients, families, and healthcare teams explore what matters most, we can support decisions that preserve time, control, and dignity.

About the Author: Dr. Geetha Chilakamarri is the Chief Medical Officer and Co-Founder of Varahe Health Services and is triple board-certified in Geriatric Medicine, Family Medicine, and Palliative Care Medicine.